The morning on the radio I heard the announcer, on our local Christian station, announce that February was the month of love. She went on to say that we all have the need to love and be loved. And yet many, especially during the month of February, feel alone.
Our need to love and be loved contributes to another need--companionship. Renowned human behavior researcher, Helen Fisher, has an interesting take on the subject. She says the nature of love is twofold. First, there are people who love another person to get a sense of completeness, security, and affection. Then there are those who love in order to share what they feel for the other person. This need to share, of course, necessitates the need for companionship. Sharing love is all about empathizing, communicating, and engaging with others.
It has been my experience that when companionship is not fulfilled, I tend to feel a void inside, creating my fear of being lonely. It may be hard to believe that pastors, sometimes surrounded by people, could ever be lonely....and, yet, many of them are. For many of them, socializing takes a conscious effort; not because they don't feel the need for companionship, but because they have a distinct fear of rejection.
Rejected companionship often makes one feel that their need to be loved and to love has also been rejected. I guess that is why "What a Friend We Have in Jesus" is such a popular hymn. He is not so much our lover as He is our companion.
For a person to be happy, finding the right companions is critical. If you find yourself down in the dumps, call up some friends and hang out. Barring that, just go out and engage in anything which involves interaction, whether it is volunteering somewhere, or just spending time with your kids.
We all have a need to be loved and to love, especially during the month of February........March, April, May, etc. (you get the picture).
This is my story...